Wednesday, September 28, 2016

Will Barber's Story

It is very hard to write about oneself.  Looking back on one's experiences are hard.  However, if one's experiences shape the person that they have become in a positive light, then they are certainly worth sharing.  I have many friends on social media.  However, in my opinion, there are only a small few that actually 'Know' Me. One may think they know someone from their Facebook profile but many times there's more to the story. People know that I love exercising, writing, researching and anything about pop culture.  However, not everyone knows the reasoning behind why I became involved in these types of endeavors.  For the context of this very blog, I feel that this would be a good story to read to learn about finding self-confidence and overcoming your personal struggles.

Despite my love of exercise, I was never an athlete growing up.  I did play sports but was unable to really excel at them.  I was not born into a family of athletes or people that knew much about sports.  I do love watching college football and Major League Baseball.  However, I can honestly admit that my knowledge of sports is still very limited, comparatively speaking. Growing up in a family where the main topic of conversation centered around 'politics', it was extremely difficult to relate to other people as a young child.  My escape was the world of movies and television.  I became fascinated by these mythical characters in a world I wish only existed within my own.  I found a favorite sport which is more commonly referred to as sports-entertainment.  That was professional wrestling.  The combination of athletics and theatrics sucked me in.  I never grew out of it although I will admit I don't watch the current wrestling programs as frequently as I used to.  I dreamed of having a herculean physique like Hulk Hogan and the Ultimate Warrior or an athletic physique like Bret Hart or Shawn Michaels.  Being a skinny kid with no advances in athletics, this seemed certainly out of reach.  More on that later.

Most people know my father passed away when I was only twelve.  While this is certainly a part of life that people must go through, it was certainly difficult for a young boy such as myself about to enter his teen years.  My father had a storied political career in the state of Mississippi and I'm proud of his legacy.  However, I had been surrounded in a world of adults (and the adult's children for that matter) where I was praised for being the son of a political legend.  However, after my father's passing, that situation certainly changed overnight.  My father wasn't from an established family in the state of Mississippi and my mother wasn't really either and neither had brothers or sisters. The professional connections and friendship were pretty much over.  As a twelve year old boy, it is hard to understand and accept this type of situation.  I developed not so much anti-social behavior but my own type of introversion.  It wasn't that I disliked people.  However, due to the fact that personal connections in my life had changed overnight, I found it hard to reach out to others. In addition, I still had what some deem 'peculiar interests' which still made it hard for me to relate to people.  That sense of isolation leads to lack of self-confidence. 

As I previously mentioned, I always dreamed of a muscular physique so I joined a gym as a teenager.  Through the help of a personal trainer, I was able to learn how to work out.  Eventually, I began socializing with other people at the gym and would get my first job. In many ways, getting involved in a gym and then working at one may have saved my life.  One interest that I developed in high school which is still strong as ever is music.  I even began playing the guitar.  As most people know, there are many bad elements of society associated with musicians. That's certainly not to say that they don't exist in other social circles.  After all, sometimes the clean cut people can sometimes be the sleaziest.  However, I was at the verge of getting involved with people who were involved in drugs and alcohol.  Even with the lifestyles of some of my favorite artists, I'm proud admit that I'm still anti-drug and rarely drink alcohol  I feel the gym kept me away from that. Slowly, but surely, I began building self-confidence.  I eventually developed an interest in bodybuilding, at least from a spectator and promotion point-of-view.  Of course, there were still hurdles along the way.  Nothing happens overnight and gaining self-confidence doesn't happen that way either, especially if other aspects of your life need attention drawn to them.

I consider myself a pretty intelligent person as I have a great deal of book smarts having obtained both a Bachelors and a Masters degree.  However, looking at my academic progress from grade school to high school, one would not think I would achieve such tasks.  I have never been diagnosed with ADHD but I do believe I did suffer from certain aspects of it.  It was hard for me to pay attention and most importantly, I couldn't stand reading.  It wasn't like I failed every course I took but I certainly wasn't doing my best.  Eventually, I was able to develop a love of reading that only builds each and every day.  I realized that if I read works based on the movies and shows I so cherished, then I could build upon that and excel at reading other things.  This certainly helped me out as I entered college.  I became determined to study hard in college and it paid off.  I received a Bachelor's with Highest Honors from the University of Southern Mississippi in 2007  Even though I don't like politics as a profession, I eventually found peace with my father's career choice and have developed a love of political history.  I decided later on to get a Master's of Library and Information Science and have worked in a public library.  That's certainly ironic considering the fact that reading was something I once hated in my life but now enjoy almost more than anything else in this world.
I also began to make life-long friends in college.  This was something I had avoided doing before.

Although not as harsh as adolescence, the young adult years do present problems to people as they become aware of the situations in life they can or cannot handle and how to overcome the challenges of adulthood.  Many people on social media recall that my mother had a severe accident three years ago nearly losing her foot.  It was tough situation for me and I took on a responsibility that I never had before.  I would never blame my mother. However, I experienced great anxiety and depression related to this situation in my life. This forced to me to make sudden changes. I was still working out, but I began to overeat and not care about my appearance.  The situation got pretty bad and I started to not care about life.  That self-confidence that I had gained from my years of progress at the gym and my academic achievements began to fade.

Slowly, but surely, I found a way to pick myself back up.  I was contacted by a friend I knew from some of the gyms I worked at about being my health coach.  Basically, this was assistance with living a healthy lifestyle, whether gaining, maintaining or losing weight or even just living a healthy lifestyle in general.  Through her assistance, I was able to lost up to 40 pounds and develop personal habits for maintaining both my physical and mental well-being.  I feel better now that I have in a long time.  Therefore, I decided to become a health coach myself to reach out to people whom are interested in living a healthier lifestyle. 

I must also mention that even though I was raised a Christian and attended Christian schools, I had kind of strayed away from my personal faith.  I began to start praying to myself again and referring to various Bible verses.  I can't say I'm attending church on a regular basis nor am I directly involved in organized religion at the moment.  However, my relationship with God is much better than it was.  I consider myself an untraditional kind of Christian.  I love God and praise him for his son who died for our sins!!!

I am proud of my father's political legacy and love sharing it with others.  However, I do remind people that I am my own person just as everyone else is.  I still miss my father and I'm appreciative everyday for everything he did for his family.  I continue to research people's histories, whether family, military or political.  Without my political upbringing, I may not have found such a fondness for doing so. 

I would say that I have definitely overcome many obstacles in my life.  Even now, I continue to move forward.  There will still be obstacles to overcome.  No matter how much progress one makes in life, there's still always room to improve.  The main challenge many people face is they look for perfection and not progress. It's not about perfection that counts.  It's about your progress that counts.  This can relate to anything in your life whether it pertains to hour health, career or family life. 

Always remember some things people.  Everyone is special in their own way.  We all have different talents that make us shine as individuals.  Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.  Whether you are a struggling student with a lack of self-confidence or a person in late adulthood bitter about their own life, if you believe in yourself, everybody else will!!!











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